What day is it? I feel like crap.

I don't even remember what day I'm on today, but I know this challenge ends on November 1st. So I guess that's all that matters.

My food supply is becoming really low. The contents of my refrigerator has now transformed to pretty much only liquid sources.
1. Jug of wine
2. Pitcher of water
3. Coffee grounds
4. Cream cheese- that may or may not be liquid goop by now
5. condiments- that are good for nothing since there's nothing to put them on or in

I have two remaining pork chops in the freezer and half a bag of frozen veggies. There's also 6 baby appetizer quiche things I took from my mom a while back but they're practically worthless as a significant source of energy.

I have 3 cans of tuna and some chicken broth in my pantry. Oh, I also have pasta. So it looks like for the next few days its going to be carb central and a low calorie diet.

of course I can go to Walmart for groceries, but that really requires me to have two hours of spare time to dedicate to fighting crowds, gangstas and inbred people: all of which I do NOT want to do.

This challenge has definitely taken an effect on me, I have noticed my weight doesn't fluctuate as much, which is good I suppose. I'm assuming a lot of that has to do with my sodium levels balancing out, little water retention= maintained weight.

The biggest change I've noticed is my energy level and strength. Pause for a moment...

think about what I'm going to say next...

I bet you're thinking I'm going to praise this challenge for improving my energy level and strength...

Right?

Well you're wrong.

In fact, my energy levels have depleted and as of this morning, I'm struggling to use my legs to walk around my apartment. Of course, it may be caused by my fatigue, which is probably the cause of my lower energy levels caused by my change of dietary conditions and habits. That's my scientific diagnosis.

Although I'm not focusing on being a paleo eater during this challenge, the food I do consume has lower levels of sugar, sodium, and all that other weird process-y stuff. So I'm balancing out all the different elements of food, digestion and other biological elements in my body which I feel is causing this serious drop in energy.

Without all the weird process-y shit in my body, it's stabilizing itself, causing a constant stream of, um I don't know what to call it right off hand, energy and usage, maybe?

Everything is moving as it should, my levels are more stable. Therefore, I don't have that insulin spike, that sugar high, the sugar crash, the cravings, the feeling like crap after eating processed food or the high I get from eating the process-y food. Not even the pleasure of feeling full. Everything just is. And honestly, I don't like it.

I enjoy getting the pleasure from certain foods, the sugar highs that give me excessive energy to be overly productive at work or school. The sugar crash at 9pm that causes me to pass out as soon as my head hits the pillow at night. Now, I lay awake for at least an hour trying to relax, unwind, and fall asleep. Maybe this is what I'm supposed to feel like, but I certainly don't like it.

I skipped out on Crossfit Tuesday because I just didn't have sufficient energy to run two miles or throw a kettle bell 30 times or power clean any weight at all. I'm supposed to go today, but as of now it's not looking like I'm going to go. My legs feel weak, my eyes can barely stay open, my arms feel useless. It's exhausting just using my fingers to type this blog post. :/

I wish I had taken a blood sample before and after this challenge to see if there was any biological evidence as to why I'm feeling like this.

Of course, all this may be easily attributed to stress of grad school and writing this rhet/comp paper 5 days before it's due. (I don't procrastinate like this, ever. Which stresses me out even more.)

Oh, also another thing I've noticed. I've been getting more headaches more often. I've done some research on headaches because I used to get them all the time, not migraines, but serious splitting headaches. They stopped once I started eating better and exercising more regularly, but now that I've been on this challenge, they're back. It could be my body's way of flushing out all the crap I was eating before, but it's been more than two weeks, I'd think all the process-y food crap I ate prior to Oct 12th would be out of my system by now. So that doesn't quite explain why all of a sudden I've been getting these massive headaches.

I'm going to go to force myself to go to Crossfit tonight, no matter how shitty I feel because I need to 1. exercise, and 2. get away from reality for an hour and focus on being better, clearing my head, and feeling like I am capable of doing something productive today.

Oh it is also my one year anniversary at Crossfit. So I should probably go and celebrate by moving around twice as much or more weight than I could a year ago.