time to relax and reflect

In the past week, I have completed my critical essay for graduate school and sent them into Colorado State and Kansas State. Having already been accepted to UTA I have begun thinking about the tuition for each school and other expenses. The weight and pressure to attend UTA is weighing heavily on my shoulders, I know it's going to be the cheapest, its close to Denton and I have friends around the area. in Colorado or Kansas, I have no one. It would be just me. Which I could use, a total do over. No one knows me, no one knows my family, or where I come from. I wont get judged because I'm from Rockwall, I wont get judged because my parents gave me an exceptionally blessed childhood, no one will know my sisters and say "oh you're Courtney/Allie Self's sister." I will be able to become anyone I want to be, no one will know I used to be gothic in high school, no one will know that I fell in love with my best friend and broke his heart. And all of that sounds pretty damn good to me, it almost weighs on my as must as the cost of school.

Thanksgiving is two days away, which as everyone knows is the day you are supposed to give thanks to everything you've been blessed with in your life. Every year at my aunts house we pass around the "Give Thanks Book", where everyone write a blurb about what they are thankful for in their life. It's pretty funny to go back and read what I wrote when I was younger, some of the weird things I was thankful for... But this year, I though I would make it a bit more public, so i want take the time to give thanks to the most important things and people in my life- first i'd like to give thanks for my amazing family. They have always been there for me through thick and thin and I know they always will be there for me no matter what, no matter what dumb choices I make in life. No matter how many times I may trip and fall on my face, they will always be there to pick me right up again.
I am also thankful for the gift of life, love and knowledge. There aren't many things in life that are true these days but love and knowledge are two of the most power gifts that the poor economy or crappy life situations can not break.

I have been blessed with the ability to learn and to love, and for that, I am forever grateful and thankful to God.

Take a minute and think about what you are truly thankful for.

It might be something superficial such as your job, your house, clothes, cars, money, music, your talent to sing beautifully, or maybe its your family, your children, your spouse, your pets... anything. Whatever it is that you are thankful for this thanksgiving be sure to let others know.

But you know, I sit here and think about Thanksgiving, it seems that it's only once a year that people really take time to reflect on what they are thankful for in their lives. Why? We should wake up everything and be thankful, in fact we should be thankful for even waking up in the morning because as you know, some folks don't even get that.